As we grow as individuals and get to know ourselves more, we become more aware of our values and what’s important to us in life.

That includes how we want to be treated.

But what does this really mean?

It mostly comes down to our personal boundaries, which stem from our sense of self-worth. 

Someone with a low self-worth doesn’t love themselves enough, or think they’re worthy enough, to stand up to those who are treating them badly. 

Someone with a healthy level of self-worth and self-love will have strong boundaries of respect and they’ll stand up for themselves when someone does wrong by them. 

Teaching others how to treat us can be a gradual process of getting to know each other and learning what’s acceptable and what’s not ok. It’s about knowing what we need and knowing how to communicate that to others. 

Where in your life are you allowing yourself to have crappy boundaries about how someone is treating you? 

What is underneath why you’re allowing them to treat you that way? Is it fear? Lack of confidence? Or something else?

To teach others how to treat us, we need to start by looking at how we are treating ourselves. The way you believe about and treat yourself sets the bar for how others will treat you. They learn from you what’s acceptable behaviour from them.

Ask yourself; how do I treat myself? What do I value? What is it that I want? What do I think I deserve?

Don’t assume people know how you want to be treated – they aren’t mind readers. You have to let them know what’s ok and what’s not ok.

Treat others the way you want to be treated too – you can’t expect to be treated well if you aren’t doing the same for them. 

Reinforce the behaviours you like by letting that person know how much you appreciate it. 

Reflect on the questions above for yourself today and see what comes up. Notice what happens within your close relationships and if you don’t like it, ask yourself what needs to happen to change it.

Catcha on the flip side,

Coach Carly